Its been way too long...

Its been more than a year since my last post. I moved briefly to wordpress but the relationship just didn't work out. Ha. So I've come back home. I couldn't leave my old blog.. its too comfortable like pajamas and a too big t-shirt. It feels good. So here I am back to write for whoever chooses to read.

I thought about maybe trying to catch you up on what has transpired since last June but in all honesty there hasn't been much to report. I now work in customer service in the wireless industry. Matt is still with Wal-Mart. The church plant that we were a part of for a few years dissolved. God's providence is always perfect and leading up to that Matt and I had felt God leading us to a church closer to home (completely unaware of the elders' decision to dissolve the fellowship). We prayed and the morning we were prepared to let the elders know we'd be leaving and Matt would not lead worship anymore was the exact morning they announced that the fellowship would dissolve. Matt and I sat with jaws dropped. We should never be surprised that our God's timing is perfect but we were. We have since found a church home in Greenville at Grace Church and couldn't be happier.

December 1st came and Matt and I celebrated our third wedding anniversary. We celebrated with Olive Garden and Harry Potter. It was a great evening. We had a vase at our wedding where our friends could drop notes. We read the notes on our first anniversary and have continued the tradition of reading them each year.

Here comes the hard part.... December is a hard month for both Matt and myself. Our anniversary is a joyous occasion but it is also a very hard month. This month would have been our boys, J.J. and Jordan's second birthday. This year has been harder than the last. I remember learning in classes in college that after a loss of this magnitude the first two years are spent numb to what is going on around and that around two years is when reality sets in and we truly began to heal. I'm leaning this is true. Dealing with the loss of a child is something I wish no one would have to experience but it happens. I praise God and am grateful that He gave me peace in the weeks following their death. I pray that He will give me that peace again as their birthday draws near.

Each year on their birthday Matt and I have committed to take receiving blankets to the hospital to go into the grief closet. Its a closet in the NICU for babies who pass away. The hospital does not furnish the supplies in the closet. It is furnished solely by donations. My prayer would be that the blankets never have to be used but the grim reality is that those we took last year are long gone. I know from experience that something as simple as a blanket can become a treasured keepsake and I am glad we have chosen to remember our boys in this way. If you would like to donate please leave me a comment and I'll get in touch with you.

Thanks for reading.